"The recommendations should address qualities such as spiritual maturity, motivation, self-confidence, initiative and commitment to doing God's work."
I really don't know if I could write a reference for myself. I know that I can and do want to actually follow my calling again, but the process is so frightening. That self-confidence word really makes me want to just stop all of this and forget it. I don't know that I could ever live through having my prayers evaluated again. When the politics aren't involved, I can serve and serve well. I have the motivation and initiative. Even here at the apartments, I have tried to do things with a ministry mindset for the kids. There is terror (really it is terror) within me when I consider being questioned about why Meredith, being fat, and last witnessing opportunity. Last night I tried to convey to others the need for prayer on this, but sadly I know that it is impossible for me to explain the difference of this application process. I know that this is actually worse for me because of NAMB. Hopefully Monday Karen will be able to see the real potential in me and the fear will not be what I present.
pondering: what will it be like when I have to apply to seminary again?
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1 comment:
I'm praying for God to give you clarity of thought and the exact words to write! Let me know how the interview goes. :)
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