Day 5

"How do you see your life?" with my eyes!
I know that I’m usually the one someone who can easily come up with colorful descriptions, but nothing came to my head yesterday. So I’m glad that isn’t the tough question from this chapter. Life isn’t party, marathon, race, or game to me...it is all of those things. Life can be those things and still be part of God’s view. Perhaps when life is a party, God is testing us on having fun. Perhaps when life is a marathon, he is testing us to perserver. The idea of life being a trust is somewhat scary at first because of my fear of the idea trust.
Life Is A Test: Most of this seemed basic and understandable. I think anyone who has been a Christian for awhile knows that the challenges that God gives us are to make us stronger and reveal us. Sometimes we fail and sometimes we succeed. It is always encouraging to read the names of those biblical failures also so that we know we can still overcome those times we don’t pass. But for me the eye opening part in this section was this statement. “A very important test is how you act when you can’t feel God’s presence in your life.” Whoa. Do we ever hear that? No, I always hear the Footprints version saying God is carrying me when I don’t feel him. I kinda want to read more about Hezakiah, for I think except in some spurts I felt like this during my beginning of being here. It is kinda scary also for I didn’t really score as well on the test as I would have predicted or hoped. I kinda forgot that God was an option for He was always there. I know I have human friends that I’ve treated that way also. I know that I’ve been treated that way also. I’m not sure of the solution on the friendship level, but I’m aware now of some of the study and heart work to up my grade to getting back to where God left me at. (for those who aren’t reading it...it doesn’t say I lost salvation...grrr..it is that he draws himself back to test or reveal)
Life Is A Trust: Now coming from a California pastor it doesn’t surprise me that this somewhat seems to be very environmental. Clearly I’m not very responsible cause I don’t have much. I do take care of the nature things and try to be careful with it. I question the money part of things with this for where I am in my life right now. When I did semester missions, we were instructed to not tithe. We were told that God didn’t expect us to. I sadly don’t recall the reasoning with that. Since I’m at this place in my life right now, I do tend to justify my lack of trust to God with the financial. I’ve even had some people I respect say that it is ok with what I am financially giving back to God right now. Perhaps, this isn’t true. But yes that would be a terrifying thing to give more back. when money seemed in more abundance, it was so much easier. maybe the outlook has to change. I think that southern baptist falter in this area for we put so many on committee that may have too much responsibility or we don’t put them on and don’t give the chance for responsibility.
The Question to Consider: The recent test from God that is clear was a test of my reaction to my family being here for my birthday. I think the greatest thing that God has entrusted to me at this time is Grandma. Not that I really own her, but I know that I have to oversee her.