Snow for about 9hrs

We had snow all over Galveston County last week. It was just for a night. It was very fun for the spirits. For me it was also a nice reminder of how God takes care of needs when we don't know how to voice them. The lack of seasons here is tough for me, so having the moment of snow was helpful for knowing I'm staying in God's design.

The shortness of it was nice since I did need to drive around doing errands. As I was driving, I saw this wonderful road sign:

For a good portion of the time of driving Grandma Pitt, she would say something about those signs. "Don't have to watch for ice today." "Don't think there will be ice today." "That sign says to watch for ice on bridge. Too hot for that today." I just had to chuckle thinking about it while all the snow was melting and I was getting hot in the car. I just thought if her little mind would have known those bridges were actually dangerous a few hours before.

Sticks and Stones

Fascist, Liberal, Girl, Racist, Christian, Idiot, Lesbian, Republican, Work Alcoholic, Fundamentalist, Nigger Lover, Feminist, Homophobe, Bitch, Lazy Ass

These are all labels that I have been given in the past three weeks. Tone with labels usually will let people know the intent of the label. All of these words were said in the negative. How sad it makes me to hear people say these things in a harsh way. No one deserves negative labels, yet we give them to people everyday. When I’m given the label from someone that I don’t know, I can let it pretty much roll off of me most of the time. Sadly, this isn’t true for the way things have been lately. It does hurt when these names are heard over and over in my head because I also hear the intent behind them. Even if I know some of them aren’t true, I want to fix that negative impression. Heck, I want to fix that negative impression for the ones that are true as well. Some of these labels I should be proud to wear, yet there is so much hatred that others see with them. What can we do to fix this?
Then I think about the list again and wonder how people get such different views of me. I don’t try to portray myself at either extreme of the names because I’m not at extremes in most cases. Do I not let people know the real me and my real values or is this someone else’s lack of understanding? I know that I’m generally private and a protector of others, but I do not want to not be real about who I am and what I believe. People who do know me should know which of these labels can actually be applied to me. I wish that people who didn’t know me would be able to find out. Political seasons have the chance of bringing out wonderful discussions or lots of hatred. I’ve seen and experienced more of the hatred this year…and my focus was for people to vote for roads not flooding because of Ike! I knew that the presidential election didn’t matter, for whoever wasn’t republican would win. Still I’m not interested in all of that mess this year (which still makes me sad that I’m not interested) for there is so many other things going on that matter.
Even with the labels, I still have to move on with life. It is like that Wemmicks' story. If I will focus on God daily, then the labels will not stick. I will be happier and more focused. God will keep me shiny despite the scuff marks of the labels.
So that is what this _________ person is doing.

Can a public Altar be this true?

"Some are finding mercy
Forgiveness for their sins
Some are fighting battles
and they're struggling to win

That's what this altar is for
You don't have to carry those burdens any more
There's a light in the darkness
There's a love that's true
And Jesus is waiting
He is waiting here for you

An old man is standing there in tears
Giving up a part of him that he's held back for years
Hearts are being broken
Lives are being changed
Those who call upon the Lord they will never be the same"

Some songs have meaning at one point in my life, and now they take on a deeper and different meaning. I know that I need to find the altar. I need to not be afraid of the altar. I need to figure out what to hear and say at the altar. I need the faith that Jesus is waiting at the altar and will love me when I get there. I hope that I can make those steps soon before more information and scary changes enter my world.

Good Bye Gma Pitt

This morning my grandma pitt died. God's timing sucks, yes I said it. This is the last picture she had taken of her. (yeah, I know she almost looks dead in it to me...it causes fear in my head too.) I took it because of the relief of breaking into the soda machine. I shared some of my Sunny D with her. I keep telling myself that she didn't really die alone...some day I may believe it.



I don't have time for services yet. Yeah, I know the dates, but I really could care less. Funerals suck. This is one of the hardest times to deal with people who are false. It urks me that people try to show they care now, but not during the last years. So yeah...lets bring on the good baptist face and freaking lie and try to deal with the crappiness of the next few days...especially without power!

Thanks to the huggles and ice cream from Mandi and Lori! Thanks to some of y'all for the messages and prayers.

Still Get Chills! FACE NORTH!

1989 West Side Story pt 1


PART 1 - awww the drum majors

1989 - West Side Story pt 2


PART 2 -- trumpet solos are required

1989 - West Side Story pt 3


PART 3 - Overly hard to march to, written by percussion director.

1989 - West Side Story pt 4


PART 4 - No I didn't play while marching to America, SUPERB Sax solo, fun flags at end.

Oh Moms*

*this is not about Sarcastic Sarah even if the rest of the nation is wanting to think her being a mom makes her unqualified.

I finally was a diligent daughter today and gave my mother the address of the nursing home Gma is at. Well, I actually left a message with my daddy. He tells me that my mother has cried a few times since hearing the news about IKE being compared to Carla. For a large part of my life, I grew up hearing the stories of how they had to get new furniture, pictures that were lost, and who they met while cleaning up from Carla. She forgets that they have done so much more to try to protect the area since then. Also, we will be safe if we leave. It is also just stuff. I wish my mother could grasp that she doesn't have to be fearful or sad about a hurricane coming. We go into circles like this alot...it would be so much better if mothers could worry about things worth worrying about.
Through these blogging things it has been interesting to read about people from my past Galveston life who are all SAHM. Even stranger to see people who I went to some level of education with who are SAHM. It is something that I don't understand the desire. My mom has worked throughout my life. The fact that she worked has not had a negative impact on my life. She has worked different shifts, but always tried to be involved. When I was in Kindergarten, she worked the 3-11shift. She would have lunch with me then take me to school. (it was 1/2 day back then) When she did home health, she went to those night event things and had great work stories to tell. When we first moved to AR, she had/got to work the 3-11 shift again. We had this legal pad where we would write notes back and forth to each other on the days we didn't see each other. She was doing what she loved doing, so it made her be a better mother. It makes NO sense to me to see educated women not do what they love and went to school to do. It urks me that women bash other women for having a job and a family OR not having a job and having a family. Mothers truly could be an amazing force of power, if y'all could just put the pettiness aside and see that each has different paths...and that is ok! I know I'm still working on loving those who have been cut off from the outside world because of such devotion to the husband and children. I truly do not believe that God designed us to not be connected and supportive of each other. However, I have finally learned that God did not enable be to be the one who could constantly reach out to those who have chosen another path.
What does it take to get moms and women to not have the same thoughts and values, but to be supportive for being who we are?

Wanna see Goofy Adults?

This is so others can read about my boss/friend Jay and his adventure for Hurricane Hunting.
*****************************
Here is a link to our live cameras. Go to this website. If you see jpcarnes,we are on line. We will stream up to 3 cameras during the storm (as long as we have internet). Jay Carnes and Mike Millo

Also, check out our blogging on KHOU.com

http://video.uviewit.com/camsonline.aspx

Who said God doesn't make mistakes?

*WARNING: language will not be censored and this is so I can get to sleep instead of focusing on the stress

Today, I got the confirmation/explanation from the doctor that I do have PCOS. It is overly true that they don't have any real medicines for this. I had to be in the doctor's office for 1hr and 45mins to hear about everything than can't be done. I was pissed at the waste of my time. As the doctor, who stupidly told me that he'd be up for 36hrs, tried to use his crappy english to go over the deatils, I just kept thinking he should hear me say I've researched it some and I don't freakin' care about the science of it. Hell, the appointment was with UTMB so who knows if he was an actual doctor as well. He has be sit on the stupid patient table and wants to touch my belly? WHAT THE FREAK? This is so uncomfortable mentally! There is way too much that they want to know that they should have just asked me to write the answers for. I'm 33, and I could care less to recall when I started wearing a bra. I'm sure it was a huge deal with I was a pre-teen, but really there is NO REASON for me to recall that. I only remember getting my period because it was the same day that we watched those stupid videos in class about "maturing." Of Course, the boys got to leave go to recess after seeing just one and we ladies had to endure a 2nd video and the discussion! UGH. yeah so I knew the answer to that one.
He also talks about the results. "You have a testosterone level that is higher than some men." Oh yeah, I'm so glad that I have ventured into the hell hole of going to the doctor. It truly is worse to have something confirmed that you already know. Now he did point to his head when talking as if to say that the testosterone level has nothing to do with being a female, but my heart, mind, and soul were already spinning and continue to. Ever since I was a little girl, I have questioned why God didn't make me a boy. Wearing dresses sucked unless you could play in them easily. The boys weren't told to cross their legs in Sunday School. Boys don't have periods! Boys can have sloppy handwriting. Boys sports are more important than girl sports. It continued into my teen years till today. I just don't get why God had to make me a female when my brain doesn't seem wired as such. Then today to hear it confirmed that God had a little mistake in creating me. He must have been part way done and the ducks were quacking about the river going to fast. Then he came back to his creating of me and forgot he was working to make a boy so through the rest of me together quickly. I am that.
I don't think like most females. In fact, it is so hard for me to interact with people at church because I have no interest in so much of the conversations. Weddings, Shopping, Cooking, Getting Married, Babies, Flowers, Jewelry -- all things that really don't appeal to who I am. Those are "girly" things,
God must have beed too rushed in mkaing me.
Thankfully, God gave me an Amazing Daddy. He has cried over the stress Jerrese and I have felt from the hair ordeal. He really loves us and never tried to lead us into a typical female direction.
(more later...I'm too sleepy and less mad to type)

A Day Off

Monday I was off work and had planned on this journey to see the G-Kamps (they are the ones with the name that is too hard to spell). It was difficult to reach them again, but I finally headed up to Longview (don't spit!) at 9:00am. On my little journey, my driver side front tire went out. I was in a little town at the time. I tried to find a service station to pull over into, but not really easy to find. So I pull over into the parking lot of a grocery store with a gas pump. My tire needed much more than air! I knew the donut was going to have to go on it. After moving the trunk stuff to the back seat and getting ready to jack the car up, a couple of guys from the Brookshire Grocery Store came out to help me. That helped speed things along some in this wonderful Texas heat. It was a great southern moment! The directions to a shop didn't make sense so I headed on north knowing I could go the 45miles on the donut. Thankfully, I found a Discount Tire in Lufkin. I pulled in and was told it would be about an hour. (ended up being about 1 1/2hrs) Thankfully with cell phones, I was able to keep my destination family updated. After doing some greeting cards, reading, and having lunch. I moved to watch the process. There was this cute little boy sitting next to me. We talked some. His mother didn't bring anything to entertain him. (What the freak are parents thinking when they expect children to be calm for an hour in a waiting area? Bring crap for you kids to do. I bring stuff for me to do!) So here is a picture of playing with the little boy.

Mommy G-Kamp then calls with a sad phone call. The middle son has a stomach virus. Now this child is like me in that he gets almost everything around him that he to becomes sick. We played with the idea while my car was still getting finished. Then I drove around Lufkin for a moment. I didn't want to not go see the other boys too! However, we all made the smart adult decision. I turn around and headed back home. Thankfully, people were out at my sister's home. I called her and talked to her while my daddy and brother-in-law made crazy comments from the background. They had to keep making fun of all the Texas named towns I was going through. Then my MandI responded to my text. She said to come to her place. So I headed there. We went to get our toes done (cause they didn't get enough scuff off my feet bottoms). Then she drove over the bumpy roads for us to go to this dessert place. Now really the meal part at the dessert place was better than the dessert! I had a yummy chef salad wrap...with all the nasty stuff removed of course! She took me here so we could play games. The games were in a sad state. We played "Speed" and "Spades" even though it was soooooo Cold! Then back to her apartment to visit and take pics. Bob had to be included in the feet photo, so we let him even though his weren't done!

After the Bloodwork

Medical life has been so full the last few weeks for me and for dealing with Gma’s health. This post will be about my health. I’ll do a gma update through email and maybe here later.
A few weeks ago, I was really sick. My defenses were down due to the stress of dealing with all the gma issues and working at a harder pace, so the germs around me clearly took hold. I still had my blood work done while I was sick. I was disappointed to find out that I couldn’t see the doctor at the same time. I called the following day to see if I could come in. They worked me in for early on Friday. During that appointment, Dr.Eisen gave me the results of the bloodwork as well.
She has determined that I have to see a specialist. It seems that all things indicate what I really already knew. I just didn’t know the exact term for it. When I see the specialist at the end of the month, I will have it confirmed. I have PolyCystic Ovary Disease. It was tough hearing that there really isn’t any solutions for it. I will ALWAYS deal with the issues surrounding it. The good thing is there are some meds that will be able to help with the effects. Now, I’ll just have to learn how to take them regularly. My appointment is at 2pm on the 28th. When I learn more about it, I will know more about what I am facing personally besides learning about it from others who have experienced it. Then, I also get to (see at camp I learned to say get to instead of have to) take a medicine for high blood pressure. Funny thing on that is it is one that Gma used to take. I may have to learn how to deal with it differently.

(note: I've had some time to process the news and I wrote this while watching the Olympics with friends. Smart idea - less emotion)

Ok Naggers

I went to my physical for the doctor today for having insurance. Now, lets try to forget that I am 33 freakin years old! Cause that reality makes it even harder to comprehend.
When I got to the desk to start paper work, I started shaking a little bit. Then I sat down to do the paper work and my heart starts pounding. I took a few deep breaths and stopped shaking, but my heart stayed at a fast pace. I could look at the book I took, do thank-you cards, or color. I simply texted then...probably should have prayed but I didn't have that faith at the moment and probably blame God some for my fear of the situation.
Now I picked this doctor because she was a great doctor with Gma. She paid attention to gma's actual needs and didn't over due anything. She listened to our concerns. She cared about not stressing Gma out. I thought it would be a good idea to pick her since I at least knew she had a positive bedside manner. This is important since most things medical involving me are negative. This is also important because of the experiences I've had with medical people and Gma's care during the last 8 years. Dr.Eisen is a very positive part of the medical experiences for gma.
Once I was called back into the hallway for the wonderful weight and height. I was trying to not noticeable take deep breaths. I attempted to make jokes for the height and weight...but nope that didn't work for me to refocus. Crapola because it normally does. Then I enter into the room. THIS IS JUST A PHYSICAL! My hands got clamy and as I sat on the table, i thought I could hear my heart. Then she took my blood pressure. While she did that she asked me if I was nervous, I said very much so. I mean really it has been 10yrs since i've had a physical; I'm in sucky health; and doctors have a history of not really caring about patients. She said my pulse was very fast as well. (duh!) Then she asks me if I've had a papsmear. With a shocking tone to her voice she reasks because I say "no." So I have to resay "never, yes I know I'm old." Then she asked a couple more questions and left the room. Now, I'm freaked out. So I'm texting with MandI, who is all excited that I'm in this horrid experience. I know that wasn't the intention, but that is how I felt at first with the texts. I ate three Ice Breaker mints because I needed something to try to calm me down...ugh I suck! Thankfully they had Kleenex in the room because I was crying as well. Final text with MandI has an "I'm proud of you" as Dr. Eisen entered into the room.
Dr.Eisen tells me to sit next to her in the regular chair...she just wants to talk. Now, I'm not dumb, so I know she is doing this to try to relax me. I don't care anything that will work was fine with me at that point. We go through her questions finding out where she needs to head with my care. She doesn't sound all preachy! When we got to the sex questions/women's issue's, she said that it is ok that I'm not old for not having a papsmear. Now when we actually talked about some of the concerns with me, then yes she said I had to have one. This woman doesn't remember Gma or even meeting me before, and I'm totally ok with that. Some how she is actually caring when she is a doctor with you and that is what matters. She had me get back on the table. Sadly, I started shaking again. (my heart never stopped pounding hard!) I was able to take the deep breaths, but she said those even sounded like I was nervous. She retook my blood pressure, and she wouldn't tell me that number because it was higher than the first time. She isn't going to rely on either of those readings so hopefully I can take it and show a lower one consistently.
She did say I needed to at least for now switch off the soda some. She said tea and kool-aid would be better...much more practical than saying water. She said other practical boring things and had me schedule bloodwork. Lets hope that is a better experience next week since I have to be stuck for it and I don't get to eat beforehand! That includes no mints to calm me down while waiting!
So...yeah I have health insurance?*
I would like to think that God would have done something within me to not make me have this type of experience. I mean seriously...all of the medical people I know and love, and I really had no control over the fear today. Bestest friends, ex-roommates, close friends, family members, and godly women in the health care fields, and I dread all of it. Craziness

*Lori, I know it is important and I thank-you for helping us all find it. If only it wasn't such a tough thing to deal with.

Tough Connection

This is my phone.

Sadly, It doesn't seem to love Carmen as much and I do. Bad, Bad, Bad Phone. It makes me sad that it doesn't like to connect with her easily.

For The Naggers

Next Wednesday, I will be going to have a physical with the doctor. Yeah, for health insurance, I suppose. (Thank Lori's pushing.) Lets hope I feel better about medical people by then cause other than those I love outside of the medical world, I'm not too thrilled! Now, I'll get to hear I'm fat and got women's health problems...oh yeah!

Miracles Happen

This is a highly prayed for desire.
This is a miracle and blessing.
This is a wonderful life change.
This is a peace maker.
This is a family gatherer.
This is a gift from God.
This is Elizabeth Fogarty Carnes!

PEO Meet

Yesterday, when I was in the process of getting to leave work, Lori's mom comes in the office and asks who has the Cottey College bumper sticker on their car. IMMEDIATELY, I was so excited and knew she had to be a PEO. I jumpingly answered "that is me, you've gotta be a PEO!" Oh my Gosh! This is the most smilest news all week long! I sang C-C-Cottey for her, hugged her a few times, kept saying how I couldn't believe I didn't already know this about her, and how much more amazingly Lori now is with this little bit of knowledge. Meeting a PEO is always postive for me because I owe them all so much gratitude. I'm sure all my fellow ducks would agree. While helping her mom carry some stuff upstairs, we talked a little more. I have to find out how she became a PEO and more about her drive through Nevada, MO. Since she will be here for a bit, I will have time to share pics and PEO safe memories!
What a treasure during these past two weeks of UGH!

DUCKS LOVE THE PEOS!

Name Update

6/6/08 The guy who does the invoices gets to see very interesting versions of my name. What is really sad is that it is my writing that they can't read! opps! I will have to add more as they come in, but I will try to print more clearly so there will not be as many! He says there are more versions on earlier invoices...shucks that would take time to find.
J.Cervila
Joanna C.
7/10/2008 Well we are actually having some fun with it now. If I put my name, I just write it and don't really think about it. That will be below. I will also put some of the efforts of having fun names.
James Carilla-ille (look hyphenated and I'm not married)
Harry Buettis (it was supposed to be Harry Butts)
Mrs.Sims (funny thing is it actually says illegible)
James C.
Jeane

Got Talent?

I enjoy America's Got Talent when I can see it. I pretty much only see it by YouTube now. This reason we have what may be a copy cat from the british version. Both could make you cry. Should be interesting how it plays out when they are in vegas.
The American:


The Brit,who won:

Happy Birthdays

So things are somewhat smiley today. Gma has an IV to help hydrate her and three cousins agreed! It is truly a good thing that we all came to the same conclusion on our own and were willing to fight for it. Nursing home shouldn't try to pawn off their patients...pffffftttt!
Today is a day for celebration and fun. It is Uncle Stanley's 80th birthday! It is Grandma's 91st birthday! It is American's Birthday! It is Amanda S's birthday. Did you know that Obama's daughter also has a b-day today?...that is pretty darn American if you ask me...not that it would change my vote! I'm making cake ice cream with blue in it and strawberry ice cream for Gma's celebration. Kinda a lousy birthday for her being in bed and all. She is on thickened liquids so ice cream will be the enjoyment..no cake.
Here is a picture from the little bit of no rain time this morning for the Texas City parade.

Here is my number...USE IT

Tuesday night I went to the nursing home to discover that Grandma had had most likely a mini-stroke that early morning. NO ONE HAD CALLED ANYONE ALL DAY! I am still pissed about that. It took about 40mins before anyone finally talked to me to inform me a little bit. During that time she was unresponsive overall, had her jaw open, and was very hot. Other that wanting to know why no one had called me, I kept thinking how many people die near their birthday. That is one of the things I've learned in my job. I just kept bawling every time that thought came to my head. I couldn't get Pam on the phone, no words from the staff yet, and grandma of course couldn't explain what was going on with her. When the nurse was finally updating me some it didn't seem like she really knew much to say. I tried to help get her comfortable for sleeping and then left. Called mother to let her know what I knew but she didn't really convey the concern I expected her to show. Pam finally called me back and said she'd talk to administration today. The nurse called me after speaking with the doctor (shocking) but mainly to say the doctor we be there in the morning.
So this morning I went to the NH and am told so many different things. The saddest thing is that the Dr. will not be in. What the freak? I'm there for four hours trying to make sense of things. I kept grandma fairly engaged most of that time. She needed fluids so I made sure to get them down her so they could do another test. I asked to be called if it was hard and I'd come back. I said call me when the blood results come in. No such luck. Tonight when I went up there she hadn't been given the extra drinks that were in her room. She thankfully had been changed at least. She was warm again, but the temp didn't register. I may have to take it tomorrow night to ease my mind cause I don't trust most of that staff. UGH! I found out that they had gotten the blood work results back. Grandma was about the same as last night, but she was alittle bit more responsive. Still answers were contradictory or non-existent. How hard is it to give the family the truth?
Hopefull, I'll get rest tonight and tomorrow there will be improvement. Perhaps, Paul and Terry will get their butts there and see that we need to move her. Mostly, I would just like it if her birthday she could at least be able to sing again.

Stressful Weeks

First of all I feel like I need a disclaimer for someone who reads this and has heard/seen some of my life this past few weeks. It is one of those times when having a friend and a boss in the same person really sucks. But I'm gonna let go of the freaking out my head does about that because my heart and head have been over full the last two weeks.

What is terrible, for me, is that there is still so much that I either don't have details for or that I can't share. Just sort of needing to list things to actually be able to be thankful God has let me live through it. So some of the things of the past two weeks:
* close friend having day surgery
* another close friend may have TB and dealing with that
* Gma has some bruise on her knee and elbow that we weren't told about
* Sally's bump
* stupid door
* Pam's surgery
* Alisa's surgery
* Shannon actually moving
* church deadlines
* Joyce's dog
* stupid family politics

I've cheated the last two nights so that I could sleep through the night. UGH...I hate doing that. My mind races so much when I lay down even though I'm yawning and closing my eyes. So yeah...I've taken the Benadryl to make me sleep all through the night. God is just so odd when He brings challenges. Making me face so many loved ones with health issues just is hard to grasp. I hate that I don't have the energy, because of the tears probably, to do something for those who I am able to do things for. The worst thing about all of this is who I've become at work. I've been rude to others this week. My tolerance level was so low with co-workers and phone patience. Generally, I'm happy with where I sit for work because it is away from some of the talking/gossip. With my faith and sleep being less, I stupidly wanted to be involved with it. Wanting to fix pain with inflicting pain isn't a good way to handle problems, yet I tried that. I freakin got reported because I annoyed with the questions I was being asked (even though I know I have to answer the stupid questions). On my facebook, I posted the rainbow from the other day. It is really true that I need God to make me see the rainbows through all the rain in my eyes. I don't like the evil that I have become this week, and I don't like not having the faith to believe that:
* God loves my close friend who had day surgery
* God loves my another close friend may have TB and will help her deal with it
* God loves Gma and will someday have truth prevail
* God loves Sally's bump and her family
* God loves the people in my apartment complex
* God loves Pam even if she doesn't have a relationship with Him
* God loves Alisa even if she doesn't have a realtionship with Him
* God loves Shannon and will find her new friends in Corpus (and find me one here)
* God loves His church and already has the plan made
* God loves Austin
* God loves my family and He is the Peacemaker, not me

Sally Update

MandI just called to let me know how Sally is doing. I know I suck at dealing with things about disease and/or death, so these past few days have been really hard. Yes, I know she isn't even MY dog! When I spent time with Sally last night and this morning, I was some what put at ease that she wasn't in almost death condition. She simply has an abses (sp?) on her back tooth. They will figure out how to deal with it when Phillip gets back. Thankfully, she is following the rule of nothing too terrible while her Daddy is away.

The Blogging World

Three of my deep thinking blogs that I read have been very powerful the past few days. I love that! I miss it severly in my people to people conversations, so having the blog world is very helpful for me.
One of the writers is someone I went to Cottey with. I actually met her when I sat in on a class when I was checking out the college. Then, my freshman year, my suite kinda adopted her into the love for meals, traditions, movie time, and probably academics too. When I went to Meredith, I saw her again at these huge statewide BSU events. It was so odd to share that other part of life with her. Then a few years ago, I learn that she was in Divinity (not candy) school. FASCINATING! Her thoughts about her path and her theology mixed with daily life are a blessing for me. She helps me to remember that God didn't design me into some crappy creature to be tossed aside. When I read her, I want to just sit down and call to get even more into it. I'm still a tad frustrated that God didn't allow them to move to Texas when she graduated.
Another one of the writers, I happened upon about three years ago. I was searching for stuff about Florida camp. This minister was questioning Dr.T and the way the gospel is presented at camp. I had to comment. Then I got to staying around and reading more of his posts. It took me a couple of weeks to realize that there weren't many women commenting, but it didn't deter me. He is a minister that truly is missional focused. He truly loves people at their core and wants to understand people. He allows us to be able to watch his daughter grow. He truly cherishes his wife. Through his blog, I was connected to even more of the SBC-blogging circle. How much I loved the way so many of the blogs had open conversations even with some disagreements. People generally didn't get all upset just because someone disagreed with them. This minister's blog is one of the best I've seen for being able to do that. It has the added benefit of making me think.
Finally there is the blog of the young one. Sometimes I read her writings and feel like take a shower from what I've read. Then there are times that just make me truly laugh so hard. Sadly, a few days ago, I cried almost for an hour after reading a post. I didn't even finish reading it the first time. I shut the computer and tried to go to bed. I had to get back up and finish it, then I still cried tears for her, me, the truth, and the commonality. Two days after reading it, I "twittered" her that I'd love to talk to her more about it. See for me blogging should be about the author feeling free to express herself, experiences, and interesting findings. I regret that she lives in the reality of fear of being loved because of her words or thoughts...especially from her family. Then I realized, I have felt that way as well.

***To those of you that have blogs to update about your family life and travels, I do enjoy those as well cause it shows a different side of you. There is just a difference in the pressure for thinking.

Sally Sores

MandI calls me at work to ask me if I had seen sores on Sally's face. I hadn't...and it has been was Thursday evening that I last saw her. Then a couple of hours later, I receive an email telling me that Sally will be going to be vet on Wednesday. Praying that Sally is obedient to the rule of nothing severe is allowed to happen to her while Phillip, her daddy, is out of town.

So that news from California

Ted Arman has big plans for his Iron Mountain Mine and the acidic water that seeps from the federal Superfund site.

They include a return to mineral mining at the location nine miles northwest of Redding, Calif., and a 200-foot Italian marble statue of Jesus Christ atop the 3,500-foot mountain that Arman says would be the largest in the world. Next to the steel-framed Christ would stand a 100-foot crucifix. Arman said the cross also would be lit up at night.

"I hope to make the property a Garden of Eden," Arman said.

But a federal official says that none of Arman's changes are in the works at the mine, home to what scientists have called the world's worst water and whose iron-red scar is visible from much of Redding. read more here

and a funner view of the tale here
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I know I've seen many of these type of large statues (been on the throw-up road too many times to Eureka Springs!) and the picture of the famous one in Rio. I just don't get it. To me it isn't something that worships God, but seems more like an idol. The two articles that I read about it almost make the man sound crazy as well. Yes, Noah was tought to be crazy as well, but a statue will not get you anywhere. There are plenty of non-Christians in California (and elsewhere) so it would make more sense to me to spend that money trying to build relationships with the people! The guy just doesn't comprehend that usually the people who come to these crazy statues are believers (or those that think they are). Does he really need to help clearly break a 10 commandment in California? My SPUH was from redding and I'm sure this will not help her to be a believer. Faith that brings stupid decisions is so frustrating. God did not take away intelligence!
Maybe Californians have such a need to be famous that they keep making dumb decisions even ones involving faith?
So now God can have a final word and just have one of those great California Earthquakes in 4yrs, and the statue crashes in the man's garden. oh brother!

Thought on through out day from another blog

What would happen if…..

Followers of Jesus concentrated on sharing their faith with a lost and dying world?
Followers of Jesus prayed for the church across the street?
Churches didn’t see other churches as competition but as allies?
Churches rejoiced when another church is thriving?
We realized our view might be wrong?
Their church is just as important to God as yours?
We recognized God likes variety?
Followers of Jesus didn’t shoot their wounded?
We acted like Grace really is amazing?
We give Grace beyond the point of conversion?
We realized God likes worship–no matter what the style is?
Churches in a community partnered with each other to reach the lost and hurting people that God has given to them?
Churches didn’t criticize other churches?
Followers of Jesus didn’t nit-pick other believers, churches or ministries?
Followers of Jesus became part of the solution rather than being the problem?
We really prayed….?
Followers of Jesus could put aside differences in order to minister to a dying world?
Followers of Jesus really became one?

What do you think?
Now, I don't think any of this is about doctrine. There are some churches/pastors that don't teach the gospel. It just breaks my heart to know that we bicker about some stupid crap around churches that has nothing to do with our coworkers, family, friends, and neighbors having a relationship Christ. Heck, I've even been listening to and watching the SBC annual meeting this week. Not because I agree with everything about the SBC, but because I do believe and support the amazing way southern baptist can do missions.

Misty Evening to GANO

Last night, my bible study class took up meals for today to be eaten by the summer missionaries for Houston Baptist Centers. Glynda was in a very hostess mood and three hadn't been to the new building. I hadn't been through the building with everyone actually living there. I wasn't ready for the emotional pull I was going to feel when we were walking through the building. First was seeing the mail and prayer board area in use. When serving this is such a vital part of support -- prayer and love from outsiders and prayer and lover from coworkers. As we went up the stairs, there was a picture that had been made for the many different children the centers serve. Then she opened the door to the guys room. The bunk beds, lack of storage, open closet, and community bathroom --- all giving me thoughts of great memories! Then we moved into hall to be shone the room for the missionaries to relax in. The was a very comfy looking room. Floods of memories overcame me from the bonding we had in our "no feet on the furniture" living room. Then we turned into the room for the women. Maradee made a comment about the bedspreads being similar. I giggled for a moment in my head thinking about making beds at RSBM. The summer house mom was very concerned about the "critter" staying closest to the bathroom because of the light. It kinda got to me when I saw the bibles on the beds as we were about to leave the room. Why isn't it when you are so drained from doing clearly God's work, it is easier to make time to read his word? Even though inner city missions work is hard, the lessons and love of God is just so high. When we left the second floor, I followed quickly down the stairs so the feelings would not be so present on my mind. We said our good-byes. On our drive out of the area, we saw a wreck. Another in the car was worried about a gun. No fear ever crossed my mind, just the hassel of getting around.
Makes me really desire the day when God makes this a normal part of my life again.

Wonder Woman actress finds body on river in D.C

WASHINGTON June 7, 2008, 07:17 am ET · The actress who played Wonder Woman on TV in the 1970s says she didn't do anything extraordinary when she discovered a body this week on the Potomac River in Washington.

Lynda Carter tells The Washington Post she was alone in a boat when she saw the body Wednesday. She says she didn't have a cell phone with her, so she yelled to some fishermen and asked them to call police. Carter waited until rescuers arrived and directed them to the body.

District of Columbia police say the body of 47-year-old Helen Johnstone of Washington was found floating on the river Wednesday. The medical examiner's office has not declared an official cause of death.

Carter says she "did what anybody would have done."

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Now, I'm not sure that is what I would have done. Maybe eventually, but not as level headed as this makes it sound. Very possibly, I would have needed some new Wonder Woman Underoos (we had them as children) if I had seen that body! Too bad she couldn't lasso it up and take it to the MEs office. Wonder if those fisherman wondered if she had apprehended a suspect...HA!

Self Absorbed

I totally need to be slapped upside the head. I just saw this overly cute cake and said it was for me. Now we have two pregnant women so totally the rubber duckie cake is for them (stephenie I think cause it is a blue background..ugh). Seriously how selfish am I to think a cake is for me when it is no where near September! This does not mean that I want a cake either.
EDITED: I've added the picture of it. There were even more questions after this post about it being my birthday. (I don't want this cake for my birthday even though it is cute!) I put a post-it note on the cake to let people know it wasn't my cake. This was before reading Lori's comment. Still too odd for this day...or maybe not because today was an odd day. (getting ready for a whirlwind week ahead)

Bye, Bye May

Although being in Texas means, I have to run the AC every day when May comes. There are some really great things about this month. Most of them involve traditions and presents!
May is the time for so many birthdays of family and friends. When I was little, one of the reason I used for saying I was adopted was birthdays. My mom, 1/2 sister, and sister all have May birthdays, since I didn't I was sure I was adopted. (oh yes the mind of a child) I actually put thought and effort into gift giving this year. While I'm still holding onto one of Jerrese's gifts, I do think I did ok with all of them. It was easier when I thought more about being creative than spending a certain amount. Of course, learning about new places in Texas, getting pics to frame, and sharing a heart moment is a little creative too! All the friend birthdays have been crazy. Yes I know next month will actually be worse for close friend bithdays, but really card shopping can just be tough sometimes!
May is also a time for graduations, which I love! Mit graduated from medical school, Scott from seminary (ugh...before me), and Joy Ruth from kindergarten! Sadly, I only was able to go to one ceremony. I really do enjoy graduations. The cap and gown, the music, the celebration, the pictures, the inside memories, and even the speeches sometimes. When I heard about all three of them, I knew i was going to try to do something to help celebrate (even Scott).
This month has allowed for a few conversation gems with Joy Ruth, the honored graduate. When I talked to Jerrese about her birthday plans, Joy stomped her feet and said in her angry voice "that is not fair, I don't like eetalion." Jerrese quickly responded to her that the children weren't going for that birthday celebration. Then, Joy responded that she wasn't going to invite Jerrese to her birthday. As the perfect Aunt that I am, I just giggled on the other end of the phone. Another phone conversation, Joy answered the phone but told me I couldn't talk because she was taking me to her room. She described the whole trip from the living room to her bed room where she closed the door. When she said that I could talk again because now Daniel can't hear, I had to ask why it mattered if her brother heard. In her exasperated voice, she says, "Aunt Janna, you know." Yep, I am the perfect Aunt with all knowing powers who just laughed at that. Then today, I called to see if mother was out at the farm because I didn't get to sing Happy Birthday earlier in the day to her. Joy answered the phone. Everyone else was outside, but again "we" had to go from the living room to her bedroom to talk. I don't know why should couldn't have turned down/paused the Hannah Montana she was watching. After talking about the big graduation she had. I asked about grandma's birthday. Joy says "I got Grandma Judy plastic flowers and she loved them!" Clearly, she was proud of her gift that she gave, and my mother has clearly become the grandma that accepts all gifts in love.
The worst part of May is that it usually has many good-byes. I hate good-byes. I don't believe all the stuff that gets said even though I usually really want to when it is being said. In a very unmature way, I tend to prefer for relationships to end through a division instead of a goodbye. This is not the way it has happened for two families that I've grown to love down here. First, my friend Shannon is moving to Corpus. It sucks. She and I were similar in game play, food likes, secret sharing, many religious views, and lived within 25 mins of each other! We became close through a board gaming group that had nothing to do with faith, church, or religion. Yet, our friendship has greatly influenced my faith. Often, I feel surrounded by people who don't approach the way similarly to me or who admit beliefs similar to mine. Shannon is oddily someone who does make me feel less alone down here...even more amazing to me that I get to share this with a SAHM. I will miss reading Dora, having tea parties, and playing Lucky Duck with Brooke. I will miss getting to teach Sydney how to beat her big sister in games! Then, my reconnection family is moving to Longview. I met the mom and eldest son while I was at FBC-G. I didn't really get to know them because I couldn't mentally and spiritually function with all those women that only wanted to talk about being SAHMs, while I was watching someone die and very much wanting to be working a real job. My friend, Lori, was training with some of these women for the marathon. She kept telling me how much she was enjoying getting to know them even though it was tough sometimes with so much talk about children. Well, she stayed close to one of them. When Jillian's middle son was very ill, she called Lori to ask for help finding a sitter. Lori, quickly sent me. Now, I've worked some for this Nanny service that does babysitting as well, so I'm prepared to go into homes of people that I really don't know. Little did I know that as I entered into this home for a few hours, my heart would be changed. I was only with two of the boys that night, but it was a full night of dinner, homework, bath, stories, game, and prayer. This experience was so wonderful because of amazing parenting. Jillian didn't really show the fear she must have been feeling. The next day at work, I thank Lori for sending me. Then, I find out that I am wanted back by the children and Jillian. Now, we begin having mini-conversations before and after my time with the kids. Then it is time to do Lori's shower, and totally giving God the credit...Jillian and I get to work on it together. Now this woman is organized beyond measure and learns her community. She was an amazing default leader of the shower (hooray, I was mediator). I loved her humor and approach to handling things. When she told me that her eldest was being baptised, I began asking then for a copy of the DVD. This woman is a marvelous SAHM who I would even not negatively call a Proverbs 31 woman...she truly does as much as that woman and never do I picture her as the negative baptist version of the Proverbs 31 woman. Now, I honestly don't know if I am going to miss the boys or her more! Thankfully, she sent her blog to me (which I've stayed awake reading the entire thing since) so I'll be able to keep up with her, Austin, Thomas, and Andrew. I may even finally learn how to spell their last name!
Some of my Shannon special memories: creepy crawly game night, moving with Brooke, "um is this where the game party is?", SNORTA, a princess party, Apples to Apples again Joe, my keys, prayer time.
Some of my G-family special memories: spell but (hehehe), washcloths in the shower, lets go to Bennigans, garage code, Austin praying, "Jonathan" baptism, playdoh time, rodeo or Janna (seriously still shocks me), the cat likes me, watchin Dr.Suess, bath invite from Thomas, tarter sauce shared with Andrew, pretty toes, teens and sushi

Thanks for a memorable month y'all! (yeah I know I still have to finish the trip report)

Fire the Teacher...UGH

CBS) A Port St. Lucie, Fla., mother is outraged and considering legal action after her son's kindergarten teacher led his classmates to vote him out of class.

Melissa Barton says Morningside Elementary teacher Wendy Portillo had her son's classmates say what they didn't like about 5-year-old Alex. She says the teacher then had the students vote, and voted Alex, who is being evaluated for Asperger's syndrome -- an autism spectrum disorder -- out of the class by a 14-2 margin.

Barton and her son, Alex, talked exclusively with Harry Smith live from West Palm Beach, Fla.

Barton filed a complaint with Morningside's school resource officer.

St. Lucie School spokeswoman Janice Karst said the district is investigating the incident, but could not make any further comment. The state attorney's office concluded the matter did not meet the criteria for emotional child abuse, so no criminal charges will be filed.

Teacher Wendy Portillo was advised by the school board not to speak to the press so she declined our interview offer.

© MMVIII, CBS Interactive Inc. All Rights Reserved.

To see the video, sorry I couldn't figure out how to embed it:

http://www.cbsnews.com/sections/i_video/main500251.shtml?id=4130015n

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OH MY. When I read the first blurb, I thought it was going to be like having Survivor in the classroom at the end of the year. But to actually say you don’t like a child and then vote the student out, WHAT WAS THIS TEACHER THINKING? That is a crock to me that the teacher doesn’t think she did anything wrong. Perhaps she thought people wouldn’t believe the boy. What is this school district thinking keeping such an unqualified teacher? Clearly the nurse knew this teacher was in the wrong. Granted it is Florida which has masterminded the coverup. I would like to hear if the school has anything valid to say (cause this is just one side of the story and she did try to pull a political card.) Hopefully, the other parent’s children will realize that this shouldn’t be said about a child even if they too wish the special needs child wasn’t included in that classroom.

Apple Bottom Jeans

If you don't know the song by Flo Rida, then you may not appreciate this as much. I was outside playing with my nieghbors when I read one of the girl's shirts. It read apple bottom jeans. Her sister then shows me (while proudly shaking her booty) that she has apple bottom pants. She doesn't have a butt much less an apple bottom!



I had to take a picture. While I was taking it the girls started singing the Apple Bottom Jean song. They knew ALL the song. Of course, they giggled because I knew all the song too. It really is sad how fast these kids grow up here with sexual knowledge. Yet, these kids often have confusion on love and respect. We've got to fix that in how people are growing up.

Aggie Trip Part 1

I refer to this trip as the Aggie trip because overall I was going to visit Aggies. Now the family I saw in TN can be included because they are AGGrIEcultural. it just seemed like a good way to label the trip for me. I also could have called it the Tuna Trip because of the Tunettes I saw on the journey. Anyways...
After loading up in the non-AC at my apartment on Saturday night and Sunday morning, I made a quick stop at the funeral home to get my shoes. Then I was on the road for a warm drive to the 1/2 way point of the trip. The traffic flow was great and the cops weren't a problem even while going at almost 80mph at some points. I really tried NOT to do that (for real) because my daddy told me over and over the the best fuel conservation is when not going at really high speeds. I'd forgotten what it was like to drive across the long bridges of swamp land in LA. There are so many people who go park under the bridges to get into the water. I was intrigued by that the first time I drove through LA many years ago. The saddest part of Day 1 was making the right decision of not staying on I-10 to go to NOLA.

I teared up a little as I thought about how much I love that city and my memories from there. Driving that much out of the way wouldn't have been smart for time or gas money. I was on a mission to get to destination 1.
Entering Mississippi to go North was chartering into new territory. You could see where winds had damaged trees at some points but most of the road side views were filled with lush trees. I learned that there is a NASA place in southern MS. Unless you are a NASA employee (Megan?) you can only enter the grounds from I-10. Of course it was closed to be public for mother's day. Still just odd to learn of a NASA spot when coming from Clear Lake area. The welcoming place in MS was helpful in confirming my original plan of staying in Hattiesburg and told me to check out the flowers at the University. Oddily, she didn't offer to help me find a motel room. I stopped to get a picture of the sign and then thought to get pictures of flowers for Jenn. The security guard was a very southern gentleman who was very concerned about me traveling alone. I said it is ok since i'm a grown up...of course I was rolling my eyes while getting in the car to head North again. I had to stop for gas before getting to Hattiesburg. Sadly the Walmart gas was closed. There were no postcards to buy at that Walmart or Shell Gas Station. I even went to the Dollar Tree there cause I though having a nice smelling candle would be cool for the motel. They had nothing Mississippi there. This is just the beginning of learning Texans have much more pride in their state.
I made it into my chosen motel room by 7:05pm. Fairly good for I was able to find Survivor quickly. I unloaded the car during commercials. Since I was unableS to get a ducky on my toe, I painted a little daisy on it that night. Sleep was wonderful that night for I had no agendas to get done in my sleep. Still my bed looked normal in the morning. The next morning I had the good breakfast at the motel...yeah for warm breakfast and yogurt! I got directions to the University from the front desk to go see the flowers. It was a little bit of a drive down there, but it was nice driving through the campus. College is just a great thing! I really do have compassion for people who don't get the experience of going to college. I get tingles just being on the campus even if I didn't attend that school. Parking was tough, but it allowed me a good walk. The gardeners were very friendly and were totally willing to take pictures for me. Then I was on a mission to wash the bugs of LA off my car. It was just nasty to me. I took a picture of it as proof to Carmen who thought I didn't need to waste time with washing my car. Finally I had to start heading North again.
This ride was filled with talking to my dad, looking at the alabama cities, trying to calmly listen to Rush and Hannity, singing fun songs, and keeping the curls alive in my hair! The Alabama welcome center stop let me know that I was traveling during National Tourism Week. They were very friendly in the building. Where I parked though had the funny marker about defending their rights. I didn't really make any stops in the state, but I thought it was interesting to drive around Birmingham and read some of the History on the signs. I grabbed a late lunch in GA. I had Hardee's and it wasn't as yummy as I had recalled from being a teen. It was pretty there in the mountains though. I also finally got connected with Carmen again to be able to let her know where I was. I had to stop again in 15mins because I was finally in TN. I got possible activities to do with Carmen and my family. Then it was on to Knoxville. Justin did a great job with directions of getting me to the Baba home.

Carmen, Justin, and I simply had some subway while we chatted. We did some picture looking, memory recalling, and good giggling. Justin had a project due, so we tried not to bother him. We got to make my bed together, and then she said the happiest thing! She told me that if I wanted to come climb in bed with her in the morning I could. I think I gave a little clap! When I was planning this trip, I had three goals to accomplish while visiting with Carmen. 1)Get some new sneakers 2)Get a replacement Rocky Top keychain 3)Have some snuggle time in bed with Carmen and talk to "jonathan ian" in her belly I heard Justin leave that morning (way WAY tooo early). I checked my email and then headed to climb into bed with Carmen. This is one of my favorite Carmen memories. We talked there for about an hour. Too bad we didn't have other Tunettes with us. Then we got ready for the day. Neither of us really had much breakfast. Our first stop was to the Recycling Center. This was was crowded! WAY TO GO KNOXVILLE! Doesn't Carmen look so cute in her top? Then we were talking about normal breakfasts that we have on our way to Target. When we got to Target the pregnant woman was on a mission to get to the Pop-Tarts. As we then walked through the store looking for postcards and at baby stuff, she ate two of the packages. The pregnancy cravings are just so fun to observe. Then it was time to buy shoes. UGH! I hate tennis shoe shopping which is why I thought getting a friend to help would make it better. Finally, I was able to get a pair and I got two other fun shoes. Carmen had people in her life she could mention about many of the shoes. Then we went to Lifeway, but didn't get anything.
Finally it was time for lunch. We went to the Apple Cake Tea Room. This is girly place that actually had stuff I'd willingly eat. It was a cute place in a log cabin. The chicken salad was REALLY fresh. Then we went to a baby/kid resale shop across the street. They had this interesting Smores maker that would have been good to get for the Christmas party, but sadly it wasn't working. Carmen got to find some cute bigger boy clothes too. She was still in search of this bag, so we went this big christian book store. Sadly still no bag to find...she needs Scribbles. Then we were tuckering out, so we went back to her home. Surprise gifts to find! Someone had given her tons baby boy clothes. There was even a brand new soccer outfit! Then we watched this DRAMA. We had to finish watching it just because it was so disturbing. Then we rested for a moment. The sprinkles were beginning then. We went to Wal~mart to still look for postcard and get dinner to make. We saw a COPS episode in progress as we were walking to the car. Carmen kept walking to the car, but I stayed back to watch the beating and pulling. It took three big guys to take down the kinda scrawy guy! Then we drove home in the rain. Carmen mentions there is a guy in her bible study class that I might like. When Justin came home, he was very happy about the right colors on the soccer outfit. We got dinner made. While making dinner, I look at the fridge and ask if the guy she was talking about is on it. He was! Hummm...then she begins saying how he may not be a good match! Justin got to have his first slice of Totinos Pizza. This used to be a Carmen staple, so we had to make sure he had it. We played SET with Justin. After playing Carmen asks Justin what he thinks about me talking to the guy. Carmen wants us to go to lunch with the guy the nest day. I totally don't recall what Justin said! Poor guy was so sleepy after being up to do his project. Carm and I stayed downstairs talking for a little bit including getting more insight about this boy that she really is convincing herself of now that wouldn't be right for me. (do all of you english major folks cringe at that last sentence?)
The next morning while Carmen was at bible study, I tried again to find postcards. Tennessee must not be as proud of their state because you can find postcards in so many boring places here! I got some very cute duckie Christmas soaps and....postcards at CVS. Carmen and I went back to the house in the rain. We simply talked some more intense topics for awhile (of course, I got my Wednesday call from Jill who forgot I was on vacation), before heading to Babies 'R Us to look around and meet one of her friends. At lunch, I asked her friend about the guy from her church and this woman actually seemed to shrudder! Soo lets just come to the conclusion that it was a nice smiley thought of Carmen's but intelligence took over and this will not be pursued. After lunch with some yummy pie, it was time to head to Hulls and Byers.
I really loved my visit with Carmen even as simple as it seemed. The point was to see and spend time with Carmen! Justin and Carmen to have a decent amount of maroon in their home, so they are keeping the Aggie love. Her phone even plays the War Cry. Who knew it would be so much fun just talking again together...isn't it amazing to have friends like that?

So THIS election, I easily pick the winner

Now, I've only voted once in the presidential election and voted for the winner. I successfully vote 75 times for Cook to win. How messed up is that? But I'm thrilled for him!

Dottey Cottey 2005

How is it that I went to college with such strange traditions? What is really sad here is that I didn't go to this event either year, yet I know the songs sung at the end. (Mandy, some how I also seem to recall parts of another version to one of the songs...hummmm)

Texas Coast Spring and Summer Air

The day before I left I came home from work to discover my Air Conditioning wasn't working. This is not good when you have to be moving around and it is VERY humid and warm outside. I just made it work for the night then left a message Sunday morning with apartment management to let them be able to get it done while I was out of town. Well I came back late Sunday night not really able to judge about the AC since it hadn't been on and I quickly showered before going to bed. Then the next morning I knew it still wasn't working. Well I forgot about calling management while I was working in the Tundra (my male boss likes it cold) on Monday. Then I just decided I'd go ask about it on Wednesday. No need for doing that now. I have cool air now blowing in the vents! The workman just came by to work on it some more. The electrician had to be the one to come to do it. They had tried to fix it while I was gone --yeah! Sadly it was something that needed someone with more skills and possibly a new wire. What a blessing to have been able to be away from here almost the entire time it was broken! The trip provided much fresh air. I'm home now and breathing in the AC air is the best way to go here!

For Jenn Poe

So I've learned that people other than Jenn will like this, but I took these pictures during my trip to make Jenn feel special. Many of her blogs and travels includes pictures of flowers. This blog will be edited when I get the other pictures developed.


I sadly was giggling alot as I clicked this one. I just was playing around with what I'd say about these picture attempts. We see this flower often in the flowers that come for funerals. It was also unique because very few non-roses were out there.


When I saw this flower, I totally thought of the part in Willie Wonka where he drinks from and then eats the candy flower. It helps that the movie was on the night before at the motel.


Now I didn't think these roses were all that pretty, but I was intrigued by how the bees flew around them. I wasn't nervous at all that the bees were going to come toward me. The gardener explained to me that the roses didn't look as nice because they had recent bad storms in Southern Mississippi.


These pom-pom looking flowers were at the welcome center in Mississippi. This is where I got the idea to do the blog for Jenn. The security guard made a point to tell me I couldn't pick the flowers. How sad that someone would pick them from a clear flower bed. Just remember that you can pick the bluebonnets that are in fields in Texas.

Blogging Baptist World

Last night after picking up my mail at the post office, I was amazed to read an article in the Baptist Standard about blogging. (the baptist standard is a texas newspaper for southern baptists...it is the more like CNN while the other baptist paper is less fair and balanced like Fox News or MSNBC) About two to three years ago, I stumbled into the world of the baptist bloggers. I some how flowed into the "hated" ring. About a year ago many of the main bloggers tried to change some of their focus. What I really loved about many of the blogs and the people who ran them was the open discussions. I didn't know any of these people before hand but I'd check links and be lead to additional blogs. There are three of them that i still glance at now. The one I started with is still my favorite. He has two atheists that regularly post. He regularly keeps things from being hateful or too heated. He also has his heart show in many of his posts. I think that is one of the best things about the baptist blogging ring. So many of these (mainly men) who share their concern based in intellect with others. It is a great thing to be able to share differences with others in a loving way. It will be a miracle when we hear that these blogs are also changing the lives of the readers.

Here is the 2nd link about those articles, I'm not sure how to make it clickable:
http://www.baptiststandard.com/postnuke/index.php?module=htmlpages&func=display&pid=7732

Lunch with Carmen

On Tuesday of my trip, Carmen and I went to this place called Apple Cake Restaurant. It was a girly place, but good portions still. I actually liked a few things on the menu. We both laughed at looking at all the food pictures from MandI's trip, so we took this picture to send to her. Enjoy!

Because I should be packing

Your ex is walking on the opposite side of the road, what do you do?
Probably not notice since it has been so long. Clearly I'd talk to them if I figured it out.

When is the last time you wanted to punch someone in their face?
oh...today...seriously I need this vacation

When was the last time you cried and why?
Friday for various reasons...the trip, gma c, loved one

What was the last movie you watched at home?
i don't recall, I watched so many while I was sick for those two weeks

What is your favorite aisle at a grocery store?
during spring - the Easter one; the juice one is the one I go down most often

What kind of milk do you drink?
Isomil

Who was the last person you went shopping with?
MandI in person; Mitra by phone

What is something you need to go shopping for?
Nothing...I'm headed out of here...I will get a CD at Cracker Barrel on the way...and gotta get birthday and hostess gifts...and of course a new Rocky Top key chain

Do you like pickles?
Yes, on my burgers

Does someone like you now?
Jr High like? I doubt it.

Do you like the color green?
depends what it is for...I'm not opposed to it

How many hours did you sleep for last night?
not near enough...usually like that before trips for me...about 6

Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?
well yeah....YOU as you read this!

Have you ever changed your clothes while in a vehicle?
Friday football trips it was part of life...certainly while on long trips and if needing to be in cleaner clothes

Do you think you're approachable?
yes, probably more than I should be

Would you cry if you found out you were pregnant?
Yes, I don't know how Mary did it...and seriously, we need a baby shower break

Have you been pressured to do anything recently?
yes...but sometimes that is good

What's your worst habit?
hummm..that is a good question --- totally my mouth...always has been...backtalk or food

What was the last thing someone said to you?
"I love you, Janna"

What's a fact about the last person who called you?
she named her first born after me...lol (ok so that isn't a fact but it sounds goo) ...she can be very fast at math

Its 4 in the morning, your phone rings who do you expect it to be?
the nursing home

What's the last thing you ate?
ice

Something you just don't understand?
judgemental people

Are you still friends with your first friend?
well she is my little cousin so yes

Who was the last person you were in a car with?
Gosh I can't remember... do bob and sally count?

Do you care what others think about you?
sometimes...trying not to as much in a balanced sort of way

Do you think you'll be married in 10 years?
I doubt it

How many people do you trust 100%?
heck, I don't even trust myself 100%

Ever tripped over your own feet?
Yes, I'm clumsy

Do you un-tie your shoes every time you take them off?
Nope...I tuck the laces in a lot too

A year ago today

May 9, 2007 - Ruth Martin Carwile died at age 98. (still sounds stupid to me to give information about a loved one like that) When I started planning to go to TN, I knew I was going to go in May. What I hadn't thought about was how close I'd be going to the anniversary of gma's death. Last night and lots of today, I was thinking about her creativity and attitudes toward people. She had this nature about her that would completely block out someone from her life if they hurt a family member or her. She really could hold a grudge for a long time. However, she was also someone that supported and loved her close family. Almost every time we were with her, we played board or card games. She was a very private person overall, yet another trait I developed. I think it would have been awesome to be able to read a diary of her earlier years. Next week, I'm going to see her son that took amazingly great watch and care for his mother for many years. I hope I can come up with a way to honor him and her memory while visiting with them.

Wal~Mart Tonight

Tonight I was in the line at Wal~mart for WAY TO LONG. I went to get ice, gas treatment, gas card load, and Mac&Cheese. Of course, I got more than that...but whatever. After texting, talking to mom/dad (that should be a side story), and reading a trashy magazine, I checked out. Then I had to get the bag of ice. This was one of those times they had someone going over those receipts. Well, ends up that I freakin knew the guy that was doing that tonight. He recogized me right away. Sadly, it took me a moment to figure out how I'd seen him before. When he asked why I hadn't called him back and if I lost his number, I had to figure out what that was about quickly in my head. UGH...I went on a date with him over a year ago. I said I didn't save most numbers from my old phone. Yep...liar liar pants on fire! I stood there talking to him for about 5mins. He tried to give me his number, but I didn't really want to deal with that. I gave him my "business card" hoping it would be lost during the next week which I made sure to say I'd be gone for. Craziness! What the freak was I thinking? I totally clued to my actions when he talked about going to a movie again. Seriously, women we have too much power in goofy situations...most likely for stupid reasons.

Stupid, Stupid, Stupid

Survivor...those fans really haven't been that bright. NEVER EVER give up your immunity! Women players that last are always evil...always! UGH...Erik even in a life women are tough to trust and these women want the title and $1 Million. UGH...totally proof of how much power women actually do have over men. This would be the reason to worry about a woman leader of the country...cause we will outsmart you boys! The finale should be interesting.

Funny Names

The past couple of weeks we've had an interesting and fun name to say at work. Now I'll play with names many times just to make the day less stressfull. The deceased name that we are smiling about right now is Harry Johnson. Yeah, go on and giggle if you want!

*yes I know it isn't very appropriate, but it is funny!

Exciting External Focus

UBC is a very missional/externally focused church. We are working on getting better at being locally exterally focused which thrills me...but really that is more about better organization for things members are already involved in. Last night as one of those leadership meetings (this was one that I we didn't really do any work in which was odd) and we learned of a more direct goal our church is going to be involved with for FY09. We are partnering with a church in New Orleans. My heart is totally smiling. I wanted to clap last night when I heard this. This may be my opportunity to go on the first mission trip of my life. I truly "Love This City" and am delighted to know that we are looking to head there. Learning more information will be great...i'm very curious as to what church it would be. How perfect if it was Metarie Baptist! What a total blessing of opportunity!

Value and Money

What is it that gives things values? I remember this being a topic in one of my classes at Meredith. Sometimes really good products can be found at a $1 store or resale shop;sometimes it is crap. Sometimes crap is at Macy's or the boutique; sometimes there are great items. Both ways we kinda have to search for the good values.
Isn't it the same way with people? Hummm...or maybe we are susposed to just value all people equally. (isn't that in scripture? well for the churches that pay attention to that scripture.) Lately, I've just really had my fill of gossipy judgements from people around me. These are just the ones that I've heard. (Terrible to think what they might be saying about me as well.) Often comments are made about clothing and education from people. Just because someone hasn't had the money for spending on clothing, they shouldn't be devalued for it. Just because some doesn't have the same school to go to, they be seen as a mission project. They can be great people with out being the same. This is a lesson we should get as kids, yet sadly don't.

Switching Security

Sucks that I feel the need to go to invited only. It shouldn't be that way Views and opinions should be allowed to be openly expressed, but I know some don't get how to allow for that. Since division can occur through people being stupid about differing views, I'm having to limit myself here at least for a bit. This is probably one of the worst things to happen for me an using a blog because I loved the comments even if not published that I had for awhile from some that were/are very different from me. hopefully limiting and needing to feel safe with expression will not last long.

JaNNa

My first name has two N's in it. This may sound pety, yet I want my name written with two N's from people I know. At work, I don't care if my name is said wrong or splled wrong by families. When I'm with people who are my friends or that I am in church with, I don't get why my name can't be spelled correctly. At camp, we did this thing about God knowing our name. I guess that is really all that should matter, but I want people who claim to love me to spell my name right. For me, it is almost evidence of a lack of really knowing me. I promise I am not spelling my name wrong...there really are two Ns! When Amy started writing my name with capital N's, I thought it would be rude to also do. Perhaps Amy was on to something to help people get it right. I know that I want to get others names right...if it ends in a Y or I or is spelled with a PH or V. Small details to show care...not really overly tough.

Collide/UBC

"The worship gathering is just one aspect of Collide. Our Sunday School class falls under the Collide Young Adult Ministry. The worship service is the newest part of the Young Adult Ministry. I know that is might not be your thing but we really need your help. We need you to commit to coming to the Worship Service for 6-12 months to help us build it up. Please commit once a month to coming to the Sunday Night Gathering. Collide is not just the worship gathering it is all the young adult small groups and bible study classes that we have at our church. I think alot of people thought they were two separate things."
They SHOULD be two separate things. It is also a church plant. If you join UBC then be apart of the damn church, don't just be apart of a clique of people. Yes it can be important to appeal to certain age groups outside the church and even in the church, but making it be the only way to be is wrong. There is so much to gain by being fully involved with the church. It makes me frustrated that people aren't being encouraged to be involved with the entire church! I am NOT apart of Collide. I don't want to be apart of Collide. I hate being forced into being apart of Collide. Don't put a crappy label on me! My role in the church (not the church plant of Collide) is to help people belong, but forcing some to belong in a collision isn't positive to me.
UGH!

Really for me

"Learning to Fall: The Blessings of an Imperfect Life" by Philip Simmons
a book I should probably try to find and read. if I can figure out how to focus while reading again...ugh.

"As a culture we have accomplished a great deal by seeing life as a set of problems to be solved...we learned our method from the Greeks. From childhood on we are taught to be little Aristotles. We observe the world, we break down what we see into its component parts. We perceive problems and set about solving them, laying out our solutions in ordered sequenced like the instructions for assembling a child's bicycle. We have gotten so good at this method that we apply it to everything...we choose to see life as a technical matter."

Watch the lamb

I should make the effort to go get the song for those who don't know it but you can do that yourself. Perhaps I'll do it at a later time.
The song Watch the Lamb is my favorite Easter song. I just happened to flip through the channels and it was on tonight. Friday, I mentioned it to Dennis because I think it is a song in his range. It is an older song...like from the 80's.
The song is about a family coming for passover. The children are to watch the lamb for the sacrifice. Then they come upon the road as Jesus and the criminals were being sent to cruxifiction. It is a great song about how we don't always immediately get that Jesus did the sacrifice for it. I also treasure the teachable moment that the father was able to have with his children. As Jesus is nailed,naked, bleeding, and caring, the father tells his children to watch the Lamb. Children can safely hear and experience the gospel message.
Yet, it is adults who are close to me that I pray would watch the lamb. This is even bothering this weekend more than others. It sucks that the bulk of my WBS class (either one) isn't really a comfortable place for me to think like this. Perhaps this is why not enough people turn to Watch the Lamb.

NOT Toasted

Waited for a bit for KFC Wrap. 3 attempts and THIS is what I got.
CRAPPINESS! Eat McDonald's Instead!